Scariest Movie In Years Is Amongst Us... Schizo!

Whilst waiting for The Joneses to start yesterday (good film, nice chemistry between some good characters and decent performances by Demi, David and Gary so 8/10), I saw a "teaser" trailer for what should be the scariest film in many years...  Schizo: The Movie.  Follow the link and watch the brief trailer for something that should be genuinely disturbing!  You have now been told...!

More Intelligent Audience Seen At Previous Senior Scottish Debates...

These "leader" debates are really starting to annoy me...  They are so damaging for politics in the country in a pathetic attempt to try to get more TV ratings and mislead the public.  We operate a representative democracy in the United Kingdom and there is no popular vote.  No one has the choice to vote between David Cameron, (James) Gordon Brown and Nick Clegg - they are all standing in different constituencies.  I think there should be far more local debates (that can still be televised) but are representative of local issues and candidates.  Here's the audience at the 2001 Election looking far more engaged when listening to a panel of Alistiar Darling, Sir Malcolm Rifkind and Alex Salmond, moderated by Sky's Adam Boulton:

BTW there is a far more intelligent (and less egotistical) man sitting to my right but I don't think he made it on camera :-(

Working Lunch To End ... What Will I Be On Next?

Only a few days after the announcement that Working Lunch's original host Adrian Chiles is leaving the BBC, an even bigger announcement comes that Working Lunch is to end.  Sad days...  Let's take a look back at on of their heydays when Adrian passes over to Rob who's "in Edinburgh [with] an unusual share club; they say they're not bothered if they don't make any money" who in turn interviews "a frighteningly well dressed bunch" (according to Adrian)....

Liverpool FC Is Finally Up For Sale! Bye-Bye Muppets!

The Liverpool Echo has posted a brief article about the shocking news released by Liverpool FC today that the club is up for sale!  The BA Chairman, Martin Broughton has been appointed as Chairman to "oversee a formal sale process".  Furthermore Hicks & Gillett state that "having grown the Club this far we have now decided together to look to sell the Club to owners committed to take the Club through its next level of growth and development".  Time to say bye-bye to the arguing Americans...

Tesco Mobile Has Me Bouncing With Peaceful Joy!

Yep, Tesco Mobile do have that interesting cinema advert riding other mobile adverts about peace, friendship, blah blah blah and cuts to a girl saying she just wants her tenner tripled to £30 credit.  Straight forward advertising and probably quite effective (although nowhere near as good as the Orange "film" adverts!).  However, I just discovered that Tesco Mobile shouldn't be so quick to dis the idea of peace coming from a mobile network.  At least I assume that's why their logo comes from Transcendental Meditation, TM.org!  I guess every little helps when you are "designing" a new logo:

Transcendental Meditation logo, TM.org

Exclusive: My Conservative Candidate Is A Klang-Banger!

Second week of the election and I've grabbed my first scoop!  I got home tonight and found a flyer for local Conservative candidate for Edinburgh South West, Jason Rust.  Yes, I know you haven't heard of him or his Lib Dem rival Tim McKay, but maybe you've heard of my sitting MP, Alastair Darling?  Anyway, as I glanced at the flyer I realised that I've seen Jason before ... at a 1,000 person, XXXXX-rated Klangbang a few years ago!  Yes, Jason Rust is merely a pseudonym for Steve Hall!  Does that make William Hague really Merrick?  And is Greg's alter ego Boris Johnson?  If so We Are Klang have reached a new level of anarchic comedy!  See for yourself what I mean about Jason:

UPDATE:  I sent this through to Steve Bennett at Chortle.co.uk to see if it made would be interesting for his WTF (Weekly Trivia File) and it made the cut!  A link would have been nice but that's not why I sent it in, just happy to share!

Swans Abandon Egg A Week After Easter...

I assume that Easter being over cannot be the reason reason why a pair of swans have decided to leave their one egg completely unguarded in a relatively open nest...  I know the picture isn't great but the day before I saw the female re-adjusting herself and caught a glimpse of the egg, but the next day they have both disappeared in the middle of the day.  I always thought one bird stays with the nest at all times to protect the delicate egg from predators...  Fortunately the day after I took this one swan was back guarding the egg, along with some geese nesting on the same little island.

'Shelter' Under Your Coat Or Away From Bad Direction?

At an unusual time of year a supernatural thriller akin to The Ring is released which naturally draws me to it.  Could it work?  First of all, yes, Shelter is like The Ring.  That is it has pointless cut aways and sudden close-ups just to try to build tension or make you jump, so it's quite frustrating.  The underlying story and what they are trying to do will be appreciated by fans of Ringu, the original Japanese masterpiece, despite the occasional ham-fisted way they go about directing it.  A quick overview of the film is Julianne Moore is a doctor of psychology who has disproved a murderer claiming to have genuine multiple Personality Disorder.  Then someone she occasionally works with (who happens to be her father, can't remember his name, so let's use Foxtrot for F, as in father), invites her to review a patient for him.  Foxtrot guy doesn't tell the Doctor all the info about this patient in advance and she discovers seemingly impossible things about him little by little, each time coming up with possible explanations.  There is one really interesting scene where (let's just abbreviate it further) Fox is playing basketball and the red-haired female Doctor storms in and a little exchange takes place where Fox tells her she has to open her mind to the possibilities of the world beyond the limits of her current scientific knowledge.  I think I've seen this somewhere before...  Was this something I made..?  :-)

Going in to see this film prep'ed with this information will probably help you enjoy it more despite some plot holes and questionable decisions by the characters.  The opening half an hour does swerve from place to place and I was unsure where they were trying to go with the film until it finally settled down with the story it wants to tell.  The acting from Jonathan as the patient in question is quite good although I wasn't impressed with the performance Julianne put in.  There are quite a few times where suspension of disbelief just falls apart and the film just feels too much like The Fourth Kind after you find out it's all fiction.  Despite all the criticism above, if you treat it as homage to the great show mentioned above, you can not only get through the film but also leave feeling pleased and mostly positive about the whole experience.  I even laughed with happiness...!

Alex Ferguson is Forgetful In His Old Age ... Or A Hypocrite!

Poor loser Alex Ferguson rants yet again, this time about Bayern Munich allegedly harassing the referee to send a player off (via a second yellow card mind, not even a straight red)... "It was typical professionalism in a way but they saw the opportunity and they almost forced the referee to get the card out - the referee wasn't going to do anything. But we've seen it before from teams like that."  Yes we have seem teams bully referees before Alex, just as my cousin posted a picture of today...

Dictionary definition of a hypocrite

Trash of the Titans - Release the Krap in 3D!

I've been thinking for a while of how to summarise this bad remake of a bad movie (that's not a double negative by the way) and then, the most talented man on TV, Sir Dr. Stephen T. Colbert D.F.A., summarised it perfectly: "they made this film in 2D and then transformed it into 3D but, here's the clever part, all the characters stay 1D". Another bad film "starring" Sam Worthington. It is official, he is the new Christian Bale (like the world needed another one!). The torch seems to have been passed (or maybe the disease spread...) and another "leading" man who apparently can act (Sam won praise for his early roles, apparently) is now stinking up the screen like a piece of wet wood. The paper the script was written on should have stayed as trees, much like Terminator Salvation (where the infection happened) and even Avatar (overly long, poorly scripted, acted and directed and an offence to have it mentioned on the same list as The Hurt Locker). The disease even affects genuine actors around them like Liam Neeson and Sigourney Weaver who seem paralysed by the black hole sucking all ability out of the shot. Expect more years ahead of lifeless movies with Sam (and/or Christian) cast as the "hero". Please put me out of my misery and let me look into Medusa's eyes (the one part of the story that was authentic to the myth!)...