A Menu Photo Is Only A Serving Suggestion... WTF!

Me: is that burger the one that comes with onion rings on? Either way can I get onion rings on it please?

Bar Zero9 in Bristol International Airport manager helping his staff out as it's busy: No sir, we don't do onion rings.

Me (smiling in ironic amusement): You know your menu has a photo of onion rings on your burger?

Bar Zero9 manager: Yes sir, that's just as it normally is, a serving suggestion.

Me (internally): What the F--k! I'm supposed to buy me meal in an eat-in only bar and take it home and add onion rings? Or am I supposed to smuggle some freshly fried battered onion rings through security to add them to this misleadingly advertised burger? It's not worth educating him, just go and take your pint of Amstel back to your table and you can blog about it to make you feel better.

There Aren't Plenty More Fish (Trophies) In The Sea This Year

Alas, it had to come to pass that Scotland was no longer the best place in the UK for fish & chips.  After the Townhead Café in Biggar won the title of 2007 Fish & Chip Shop of the Year (announced January 2008), it has been a one country race.  The following year the Anstruther Fish Bar in, erm, Anstruther (Fife) carried the torch on winning 2008 Fish & Chip Shop of the Year, then we head west as Atlantic Fast Food in Coatbridge (Glasgow) is crowned (the realigned title of) 2010 Fish & Chip Shop of the Year.  Three glorious victories in a row!  Back to present day and despite the best efforts of Doms Chip Shop in Thornton (Fife), who won Best in Scotland but never made it into the top three places UK-wide, it's a Yorkshire chippy that takes the title back to England as Fish and Chips at 149 takes the 2011 trophy to Bridlington, Yorkshire.  Oh well, I still haven't made it to Coatbridge for last year's winner yet so maybe I should do that before next year's winner gets announced...

Book Sellers Think Computer People Are Degenerates!

There is a man.  He lives in the Far East.  He reads books.  He sometimes reads books about computers.  He is quite observant.  He was so shocked when he saw this sign in a well-known book store...  I know, I'm horrified too. Why would someone want to read a book about the iPod Touch?  What?  Is that not it?  Even lower... :-?  Ah, you mean metaphorically!

Thanks P5ychofox, Wiley Coyote or whatever the hell you are calling yourself now!  :-D

Food Is A Rewarding Business In Edinburgh

Within a very short radius of Edinburgh are some stunning places to eat, although a few have yet to be recognised in the new Michelin Guide (out today).  Edinburgh maintains its five one-star restaurants: Number One at the Balmoral Hotel on Princes Street; 21212 in New Town; The Kitchin, Martin Wishart and the Plumed Horse all at The Shore.  Slightly out of town Champany Inn in Linlithgow maintains its star as do the Peat Inn and Sangster's, both over the water in Fife (about an hour away).  That's six Michelin-starred restaurants within the Lothian region and still leaves Rhubard (at Prestonfield House) bereft of deserved star.

Slightly disappointingly was the loss of two Bib Gourmands, which are awarded to establishments that represent value for money regardless of price.  Tony’s Table in the city and The Wee Restaurant in North Queensferry (first stop over the Forth) both lost theirs, however Osso in Peebles gained one.  Finally the Rising Star is strangely still held by the same place, which caused a lot of confusion to other people reporting on it (until yours truly corrected them, thanks to the guidance of my culinary-guru Neil McRobie).  For the last four years Abstract on Castle Terrace was given a Rising Star award however last July it was replaced by a new venture, co-founded by Tom Kitchin, simply called Castle Terrace on the very same site.  This now has rightly received a due praise and received a Rising Star.  It all bodes well for the future, if they simply decided to recognise Rhubard...

One Of The Best Car Stickers Ever!

Who concurs? I do, if anyone cares...! :-P

How Capriciously My Mood Has Swung To One Of Solemn Tender

I hate Januarys, the month of l'arnacoeur (and not in the great film way)...  Meanwhile, this non-news just in; Phill Gillespie is found to be being overly dramatically and should abdicate his Drama Queen title for the good of everyone... 

You Get An Awful Lot For Your Pound At B&Q...

I'm guessing the might want to add a quantifier in that heading, like 'each'...

Happy Christmas From A Winter Wonderland!

What better way to celebrate Christmas than let someone else do all the hard work, both in the kitchen and behind the lens?  I present you, two great shots from the soon-to-be-winner of a Michelin star Neil McRobie!

Apologies To Iceman, Seems He's A Do-Gooder After All!

Yesterday I accused Iceman (think cartoon of The Amazing Spiderman) of being captured on CCTV trying to steal so icicles.  Well, having returned to the site today they have increased in size proving Iceman was clearly adding to the icicles rather than trying to swipe them!  Bobby Drake, I apologise!  In other news, I think the idea of winter-madness is clearly proposterous...

Life's A Beach With Snow-Where To Hide...

So before the snow returned to Edinburgh, Liverpool was hit so hard that the sea froze, the Liver Birds put on red scarves and the sand changed it's chemical structure. Either that or it snowed so hard funny scousers built an igloo on the beach of the Mersey (right next to Gormley's Another Place).  Credit for the photo goes to 'me Ma'...