Why Wait 2 Weeks? I Already Have Now '82

Sigh... Okay, some songs were recorded in 1982 but officially it was released in 1983 (source Wikipedia) but still, Now 82 means Now '82 to me! Feeling old...

Orange & Ginger Is Good, So Long As It's Not In A Scottish Tanning Salon!

Rekorderlig launch another great new flavour, possibly only in pubs right now... Tesco are selling Apricot & Peach but pubs, including Milnes on Hanover Street, are selling a delicious Orange & Ginger cider. This is not the first time these flavours have been combined, Crabbies have a special Orange Edition of their Ginger Beer but really it's not great and is a bit too sweet (bet you didn't know I spoke French!). As always Rekorderlig's ciders are not overly sweet and have a perfect balance of flavours. I strongly recommend you try and find it, more so than Koppaberg's Cloudberry.

The British Icon (BA) Is Back In "You Only Fail Twice"

Well done!  I'm usually irked by the word "fail".  For me you can put it in the same category as other short term pseudo technical words that the masses adopt, well, en masse.  But when British Airways manages to fail to load their own brand new "transfer BMI points to us" page (frame) and then hits the ultra-rare 'double-fail', even I relent and think that's impressive!  So behold, British Airway's beautiful double-fail:

I'm On Cloud Nine With Kopparberg's Cloudberry Cider!

Okay, maybe I just hyped it up for that headline (or Instagram post)... Truth is Cloudberry is a light, sweet and very fragrant cider that is exclusive to Belhaven Pubs (such as The Black Bull in Edinburgh). Kopparberg make decent ciders but compared to their countrymen at Rekorderlig they just miss a sharpness and clarity. But that said they are a lot better than Bulmers (Scottish & Newcastle brand, not the original Irish Magners).

My Soft Pink Dismembered Member Flops Out On My Bed

Nothing to see here, just that I can remove my soft pink thing (with bulb-shape thing underneath) and just leave it lying out on my hotel bed...

In case anyone is really wondering, it's my camera cover!  I call it William...  Or sometimes Richard...

Paying A Pretty Woman A Compliment Makes Me Gay?

Picture the scene, you bump into a girl you haven't seen in ages at a wedding and notice her dress. You pay her an observant compliment and in reply you are asked if you are gay!

Me: Wow, you look like Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman!

Her: You're the only person to have noticed that! I love that film, that's why I bought the dress! Are you sure you're not gay?!

Top Marks For Top Shop's Sign To Nowhere

"Entrance this way" with no arrow on a walkway that has people going in both directions is not a helpful sign. Then again maybe it's for the best...

Taking Your Cherry Shouldn't Leave A Bad Taste In My Mouth

Does it get any better than this? All the best bits of Cherry Coke less the nasty sugary after taste plus the better taste of Pepsi! Plus you can still sing the Savage Garden line "like drinking Cherry Cola". Only downside is that I have only found Pepsi Max Cherry in 2 litre bottles so far. Cans please PepsiCo!

Proof Babies Are Nothing But Trouble (By Dragonfly)

Babies are notoriously trouble to such an extent that Dragonfly (111 Broughton Street, Edinburgh) decided to display this apt baby-grow (or whatever it's called). "Been inside for 9 months... " - pure gold!

Why Do Nearly Naked Men Crucify People Upside-Down?

I'm struggling to make sense of the world right now...  Walking along York Place I see a group of men walking along in the bus lane, nearly naked, carrying a large and heavy wooden structure.  Catching up with them as they turn left to get to Multrees Walk I can their "friend" on an inverted crucifix with his blonde hair flopping down.  Lifting over the bollards wasn't easy and it clear takes a lot of effort.  Can anyone tell me why they would be doing this?  It seems too intense for a stag party, plus everyone seemed relatively fit.  Perhaps an end-of-season team event due to a lost bet..?